Forget This!
by Sugary Snicket
Summary: A Slippery Slope semiparody. Includes random referances to other things for my peeps in other fanfiction areas to look though on the off chance that they are an Unfortunate Events fan as well as a Danny Phantom fan.
1. Myst, a Squeaky duck, and Snow Gnats

_Okay, let's get this straight._

_I've been off for a while, and all of my good story ideas haven't been planned out yet, due to ASOPE2 taking longer than expected to prewrite. Yes, I prewrite. And all of you other wirters out there should, too, it makes stories look better and can help you find spelling mistakes and ways to make your stories better. Not that I'm dissing anyone. I'm just saying - it's easier to take time writing a prewritten document out by hand than to just type and submit. Most of my early documents were type and submit. Trust me, it's NOT a good idea._

_This is my first parody for ASOUE. It will probably also be my last, because, at heart, I am not really a parody writer. It's just not my chosen method or style. I prefer more suspenseful works, more mysteries in my stories, but don't get me wrong - I too like to add some humorous bits into my stories to break up the tension. Just take a look at some of my humorous works! Because parodies are more rambunctious, I'll let more of the humor show, and try to let go of the edginess that I usually use._

_As for any newcomers to Fanfiction that may be reading this, hello and salutations! Parodies are an excellent way to start out, but also try to write other types of stories so you can find the style you like. In short - **write the type of story that YOU would want to read.** That way, you enjoy writing it (and sometimes, re-reading it!) as much as, if not more so than, the person who is reading your story._

_A warning to those reading this right now: This is a Book the Tenth semi-parody. You'll probably see random cameos from charicters from my favorite computer games, books, cartoons, and even movies, even myself! So, don't be surprised if I pop in every so often. This is the result of a bored, tired mind thinking to herself while lying in bed on Saturday morning - it's not going to be good._

**Disclaimer In Advance: I don't own "A Series of Unfortunate Events" or any of its charicters, and I also don't own "Myst 3: Exile", "The Nightmare Before Christmas", "The Amazing Spider-Man", "Harry Potter", "Danny Phantom", "Spongebob Squarepants", or any of the charicters therein. It would be awesome if I did, but I don't, so there. Don't own any of the products that might be mentioned, or any of the movie quotes that may be used, either. So there.**

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_Dear reader,_

_If you like coherent stories that make sense, I'm sorry to tell you that you've chosen the wrong one. (Hehe, you chose the wrong one! That's right, feel bad.)This tale has nothing inside of it but randomness and stupidity, and you will most likely find yourself laughing so hard that it hurts, how sad for you, BOO-HOO! A sampling of the terrible things in the pages of this tale include: Talented insects, crazy people, dueling superheroes, Squees, reversed shippers, A villain losing his memory, random shouting, and things a certain baby does in her spare time while being held hostage on a frozen mountain peak. Clearly, you don't want to read about any of this. No, really, you don't. It's pointless and is just a good excuse for the authoress to ramble. Okay, fine. Read it. I really don't care. Really, I don't._

_With all due respect,_

_Sugary Snicket_

Sugary: We begin our story at the beginning. -plays story-

Mr. Poe: Baudelaires, I'm sorry to tell you this, but - coughcoughcoughcoughcoughcoughcoughcoughcoughcou-

Sugary: Whoops! Too far back! -fast forwards-

Violet: Count Olaf was our mother in disguise?

Klaus: But wouldn't that mean that, when he was disguised, our mother was Olaf in disguise as Stephano, Captain Sham, Shirley, Coach Genghis, Gunther, Detective Dupin and Mattathias... MY BRAIN HURTS!

Sugary: Oh dear, now I've gone too far... -rewinds-

Violet and Klaus: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Sugary: There's the part! The Baudelaires were careening out of control down the mountain path! Bwahahahaha! Sugar!

Violet: Did you really have to add the word "sugar" there?

Klaus: Sugar? I like sugar!

Violet: Mmmm... sugar...

Lemony: -walks into story- Hey, wait a minute! points at authoress YOU can't be Lemony Snicket! I'M Lemony Snicket!

Sugary: Quiet, you! -ties to chair-

Lemony: gives Sugary a very dirty look

Sugary: I SAID QUIET!

Lemony: But I didn't say anything!

Sugary: -roaring- QUIET!

Lemony: -intimidated by all of the yelling - Fine...

Violet: Uh, hello? Baudelaire orphans? IN TROUBLE?

Klaus: SOO!

Sugary & Lemony: Soo?

Klaus: Save Our Orphans! DOOORRRRHHHH...

Sugary: Of course! Okay, so the Baudelaires parachute out of the wildly careening caravan, and -

Lemony: That's not what's supposed to happen! Violet's supposed to make a clever invention, and - -looks at Violet-

Violet: -is calmly painting her nails a lovely shade of purple-

Lemony: I see your point. Carry on, then.

Klaus: Violet, we have to jump!

Violet: pouts But Klaus... I'll mess up my nails!

Klaus: Blah, blah, blah, your needs! -grabs Violet and jumps out of caravan, which falls off a nearby cliff-

Violet: ...

Klaus: ...

Violet: ...

Klaus: ...

Violet: ...

Klaus: ...

Violet: ...

Klaus: ...

Violet:... that was close.

Klaus: Hah! I won!

Violet: You won what?

Klaus: I won what? -A random Myst linking book falls from the sky, Myst theme music plays- Hey, what's that?

Violet: It looks like a book!

Klaus: And it has it's own theme music!

Lemony: Myst? What is a Myst book doing in MY story?  
Sugary: Geez, posessive, aren't we?

Klaus: Let's see what it does! -picks up book-

Atrus: -randomly appears via convinient plot hole- Oh no, not again! The LAST person who found my Myst book caused enough trouble! -takes book back, then links into it-

Klaus: O.o

Violet: O.o O.o

Klaus: O.o O.o O.o

Violet: O.o ... Who was that guy?

Lemony: ARRRGH! -rocks chair back and forth in anger- Atrus. Does. Not. Belong. In. My. BOOK!

Sugary: -grins- Niether does that squeaky duck, but you don't see me complaining.

Klaus: -picks up squeaky duck and squeezes it-

Duck: Squee... keee...

Klaus: XD

Violet: MY SQUEAKY! -tackle-glomps Klaus and takes duck-

Klaus: -big, teary anime eyes- Violet...

Violet: -is squeaking the duck- Yes?

Klaus: -is disappointed that his big, teary anime orphan eyes didn't do anything- Never mind. Let's go find our sister.

Violet: O.o We have a sister?

Lemony: inhales sharply Whatever. Just make sure the snow gnats get them.

Baudelaires: -start walking-

_**Five Minutes Later...**_

Baudelaires: -still walking- -A buzzing noise is heard on the horizon. It gets closer and closer until we see a large cloud of insects buzzing towards the Baudelaires-

Violet: What's that?

Klaus: Ah-uh-oh.

Violet: What?

Klaus: AH-UH-OH!

Violet: Oh. That's what I thought you said. -squeaks the squeaky duck, but loses hold of it, and it topples over the edge of a cliff Big teary Anime eyes- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooo... -bursts out crying-

Snow Gnats: Hey, what's wrong?

Klaus: She lost her squeaky duck.

Snow Gnats: Oh. That sucks.

Klaus: Majorly.

Lemony: Okay, what is going on here? Why aren't they stinging the orphans?

Snow Gnats: You didn't pay us our wages. Stinging people costs extra. -To Violet- Hey, you like impressions?

Violet: -sniffles and nods-

Snow Gnats: Okay, then. -form the shape of a sign that reads "Eat at Joes", form the shape of a ship under attack, form the shape of a cat, form the shape of the symbol for female, form the shape of the symbol for male, form the shape of an infinity symbol-

Violet: Wow.

Klaus: The control!

Lemony: But that's not right!

Snow Gnats: -form the shape of a hand and give Lemony the finger-

Lemony: NOOOOOO! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO STING THEM! ARRRRRGGGGHHHHHH!

Snow Gnats: You want stinging? We'll show you stinging. -fly up to balcony where Lemony is, sting him repeatedly-

Lemony: Ow! Ouch! Why me?

Sugary: Okay guys, cut it out. I perfectly understand why you're mad at Lemony for not paying your wages. Just calm down.

Snow Gnats: But we worked all day, and all we got were these lousy t-shirts that say "I worked all day and all I got was this lousy t-shirt!"

Sugary: Did he pay you in only coupons, too?

Lemony: No! I didn't think you guys would notice!

Snow Gnats: You didn't think we'd notice, eh? Fine. We're going on strike!

Lemony: WHAT?

Snow Gnats: You heard us! -form a symbol of a picket sign that reads "Lemony is a Jerk". They leave the building-

Lemony: Wait! You can't just leave! I OWN YOU! -runs after them-

Klaus: Uh, want to discuss this over Dr. Peppers?

Violet: -nods. Both sneak off to the lobby-

Sugary: Uh, I think I'll join them, if you don't mind. I don't expect anyone would WANT to review... But I suppose that you can. See ya next chapter!


	2. A Random Spooky Cave and Quigley

_Thanks to the two-plus people who reviewed already. There may be more in my In-box right now, but I'm too tired to check, because I was up all night trying to find a way to continue this incredibly stupid story, because everyone seems to like it so well. And I've STILL yet to plan even ONE of my better stories. I need to get cracking, but Paranormal Events 2 is only a third of the way prewritten, and I have about a gazillion other ideas that I need to plan out and eventually write. I don't even know when many of them will be out!_

**_Disclaimer: I own nothing! Nothing, see?_**

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Baudelaires: -continue walking-

Violet: I'm tired, we need somewhere to rest.

Baudelaires: -come upon a random, spooky cave-

Violet: Wow, Klaus! Look at that random, spooky cave!

Klaus: How convenient!

Violet: Let's go in!

Klaus: Sure, why not!

Violet: We're using a lot of exclamation marks in our sentances for some reason!

Klaus: I know! It's so weird!

Violet: I blame the authoress!

Lemony: Ha ha, they blame you!

Sugary: And that's your slogan! XD

Lemony: ...

Baudelaires: -enter random, spooky cave-

Violet: HELLOOOOoooooo...

Myriad of voices: SHUT UP!

Violet: Sounds like it's okay to go in.

Baudelaires: -walk deep into cave, eventually come upon a group of people wearing fencing masks- Hi!

Group of People: Hi! -Take off masks- -The following people are in the cave: A random kid, a random kid, a random kid, GIR, Invader Zim, Jack Skellington, Harry Potter, a dog, a cat, a moose, a plate of tacos, the squeaky duck that fell off the cliff, Me, Carmelita Spats, and some kid who refuses to remove his mask-

Violet: -looks at group of people- Well, I don't see anything odd.

Sugary: Jack! You came to visit me from the Nightmare Before Christmas section of Fanfiction! -huggles Jack-

Jack: Hi, Sugary. Can you let go? You're kind of squishing me.

Sugary: -lets go- Oh. Sorry.

GIR: -to Violet- HI LADY! -runs over to moose- This is my moose. He's my pet! I LOVE YA, MOOSE!

Zim: Yes. A moose. A moose... OF DOOM!

GIR: Doom? I like doom! I'm gonna sing the doom song now! Doom doom doo-doom doomy doom doom-

Klaus: He's hyper.

Zim: Yes -DOOM!- I know.

Violet: Wow, you sure do like doom. And Tacos!

GIR: -stops singing- Tacos? TAAAAAAAACCCCOOOOOOOOOSSSSSSS! -explodes-

Carmelita: Yay, the annoying one is dead!

GIR: -puts self back together- Hi people hi!

Carmelita: ... darn it. Screw you. I'm singing my song!

_C is for cute!_

_A is for awesome!_

_R is for really awesome!_

_M is for xylophone!_

Sugary: I know how to play the xylophone!

Lemony: That's not how her song goes! And who are all of these random people?

Sugary: People I stuck in to make the Snow Scouts look like a cool group of peeps who hang out in a cave together. Pimpin'.

Lemony: WHAT!

Klaus: He went on "Pimp My Book Series", didn't he?

Sugary: Yup. And I've just PIMPED it!

Harry: Why are we even talking about this?

Others: Quiet, you!

Sugary: Have a taco and be quiet for an hour.

Harry: But I don't like tacos.

Sugary: No?

Harry: I only like burritos.

GIR: Burritos? BUUUUUURRRRREEEEEEETOOOOOOOEEEESSSSS! -explodes again-

Carmelita:

_E is for... Uh, I don't know!_

_L is for-_

Everyone else: LOSER!

Carmelita: Hey!

Sugary: -boots Carmelita out of the story because nobody likes her, anyway-

Lemony: GAAHHHH! OUT! ALL OF YOU! GET OUT!

Harry: But I'm not gay... I can't come out!

Lemony: ARRRGGHHH! -pounds head against table repeatedly-

Jack: -grins evilly, sneaks up to balcony behind Lemony-

Lemony: -is dizzy from pounding head on table-

Jack: RAWR!

Lemony: -screams like little girl-

Sugary: Jack!

Jack: I'm sorry! I couldn't help it!

Sugary: No, no, no, not THAT - you know PERFECTLY well that that was NOT a scary roar.

Jack: I know...

Sugary: It should be more like this - RAOAWR!

Audience: -scream and faint-

Jack: -pouts- No! I'm s'posed to be scarier...

Sugary: You are. You scared Lemony.

Jack: Maybe you're right about the roaring, Suga- RAOWAER!

Sugary: -screams, flips out-

Jack: Yup. I've still got it! See ya, Sugary. -leaves-

Sugary: Kjseyhfiojdgjwosjfhj'shky! -pants- I'm okay.

Baudelaires: Hello?

All: THE STORY?

Sugary: Oh, yeah. So, the other random charicters leave.

Other random charicters: -leave-

Sugary: Leaving the Baudelaires with the masked person.

Masked Person: Hey, Baudelaires. I know how to find your sister.

Violet: Really?

Klaus: We have a sister? O.o

Lemony: YES! Yes, Klaus... You... DO... have... a... sister...

Klaus: Cool! XD

Masked Person: Follow... MEEEeeeeee!

All: -Are sitting on top of the mountain where Sunny is-

Violet: That was convenient.

Announcer man: Because he's -masked person takes mask off- QUIGLEY QUAGMIRE!

Quigley: -superhero pose-

Violet: -Fangirl squeals, faints-

Lemony: Oh my God...

Sugary: XD He's HAWWWWWT...

Violet: Back off! MY MAN! -Snarls-

Sugary: Fine. You wanna fight for him, &$ ? -catfight ensues-

Sunny: -randomly walks up to Klaus- Sjkadhaoishmsd,ahf;kajhl;zshalfhsljkuo;ithjylszjkhgerpugnzuroighuzhnifuuuuuuuuuuuuxloijvhubpio8fd. (Hi.)

Klaus: Hi, Sunny. How are you?

Sunny: Mystthesurrealisticadventurethatwillbecomeyourworld. (Good. And you?)

Klaus: Can't complain.

Sunny: Riventhesequeltomyst? (Hey, what's going on with those two?)

Klaus: They're having a fight. Over HIM. -points disdainfully to Quigley- He isn't even that hot.

Sunny: Mystthreeexiletheperfectplacetoplanrevenge... (What do you mean? He's positively drool-worthy...)

Klaus: Whatever. I'm sexier. -starts dancing and singing- I'm too sexay fo dat guy, too sexay fo dat guy, because I am so fly!

Sunny: O.o Mystfourrevelation? (Uh... Klaus?)

Violet: I win!

Sugary: -Is out cold on floor-

Quigley: Omigawd, Violet you are so hawt!

Violet: I know.

Klaus: NO! I'M TOO SEXY! I EVEN SUNG THE WORDS ! I SUNG THE WORDS!

Sunny: Mystfiveendofages. (What a baby.)

Violet: -scoffs- I know? What is he, four?

Klaus: Yes! -is wearing a shirt that reads "I am four" on it-

Violet: O.o

Sunny: O.o (O.o)

Quigley: O.o

Lemony: O.o

Sugary: -wakes up- O.o

Sunny: Uruagesbeyondmystpathoftheshelltod'nilive? (You're wierd.)

Lemony: -can't take it anymore- You. Are. Not. FOUR! -Rips off Klaus' shirt and sticks his actual shirt back on- And Sunny - stop saying the titles of Myst games. We all know that it's only a shameless marketing ploy.

Sunny: Sublimyst. (And so what if it is?)

Lemony: I thought we weren't doing marketing in this story.

Sunny: MystRivenExileFanatic. (Don't blame me. The Authoress is a huge Myst fan.)

Sugary: Yeah! And I've won the first three games more times than you or I can count!

Lemony: What about the other two games?

Sugary: Haven't gotten to Myst five yet, and Myst four won't install. Meh, whatever... MYST 3 ROCKS! -Puts on shirt that says "I fell into the Star Fissure and all I got was this stupid T-shirt!"-

GIR: YAAAY FOR MYST!

Sugary: Mmhmm.

Lemony: IS EVERY FIVE SECONDS OF THIS STORY GOING TO INVOLVE SOME STUPID MYST ALLUSION?

Sugary: Mmm... probably.

Lemony: GAAHHHH! M,asfhao;lonhwiufhpj;niazsuwpgfbziushjgfblsafnhboazISubpdgjmnjzsuiospifdhzgnbho;izshgdoiwjrvfhngoinaveweporuaycvopyitvaieygvpoeargynapvoienveiotynpoasveingyiypsvy!

Sunny: D'nimoose? (He gonna be alright?)

Violet: I honestly don't know.

Olaf: -randomly stomps outside- Hey, what are you orphans doing?

Klaus: -pulls out blowdart gun and darts Olaf-

Olaf: Ow! Hey-... cookies... -falls over, unconscious-

Violet: Who gave you that?

Klaus: Nobody. I found it.

Violet: Oh. Well that's okay, then.

Olaf: -wakes up- Hey? Who are you? Where am I? Why is that kid dancing like that?

All: -turn to look at Quigley-

Quigley: -Is dancing to and singing "Doncha" rather poorly, and in a girly fashion- Oh, doncha wish yo' girlfriend was HAWT like me?

Esme: -randomly appears- I AM hot! I am, I am, I am, I am, I AM!

Sugary: -pushes Esme off cliff-

Lemony: ARRRRGGHHH!

Sunny: D'nisunnyRhymeHollaatchasunnymoneyfunnybunnyd'niclunnygunnyhoneyfrunnytunnyblunnyrunnyoneywunnyquhneedaknee... (Has anyone ever noticed that D'ni and Sunny both rhyme with each other? As a matter of fact, I think I'll name some more stuff that rhymes with Sunny right now! sunnymoneyfunnybunnyd'niclunnygunnyhoneyfrunnytunnyblunnyrunnyonwunnyquhnee...)

Olaf: O.o Who am I?

Violet: Who are you?

Lemony: ...

Sugary: Uh... whatever happened to the story?

Klaus: I thought there wasn't any story.

Sugary: Oh yeah... That's right! So, uh, what do we do now?

Quigley: End the chapter?

Sugary: Uh, okay then. It's the end of the chapter, everyone. ISN'T THAT SPECIAL? XD

All Lemony Snicket Charicters, Including Lemony: -Shudder, hiss-


	3. Bad parents, superheroes, and a sled!

_Hello again, and welcome to yet another update for Forget This! When last we saw our intrepid young heroes, they had been reunited with Sunny at last and met Quigley, and Olaf had forgotten who he was! Oh noes! What will they do?_

_Also... Today is my birthday! Yzay! I'm 15! Yzay! Happy Birthday to me! Yzay! I'm saying yzay too much! Yzay!_

_**Disclaimer**: I own nothing. None of this is mine. Not Spider-man, Danny Phantom, or GIR. Not any of the ASOUE charicters, not Cyan Worlds' charicters, none of them. So don't ask me for the rights to any of them._

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Olaf: No, seriously - who am I?  
Violet: Oh, nobody special, you're just an evil count who tried to marry me to get the Baudelaire fortune and now you chase us wherever we go to get said fortune.

Olaf: Oh, is THAT all?

Violet: No. You were also a huge pain in the &$# as well.

Sugary: Violet! No swearing in this story! Who taught you that kind of language?

Violet: My parents.

Lemony: WHAT?

Violet: Yeah, remember when they said that I was s'posed to take care of my siblings?

Klaus: Ooh, neat, a flashback!

-flashback-

Baudelaire parents: Violet, as the eldest child, you are allowed to swear, wear tight clothing, eat nachos every night, drink Pina Coladas every thursday, command ownership of the X-box and all of its games, watch NC-17 rated movies, and purchase a large cake for yourself and eat it all. Is that clear young lady? And if we ever catch you doing anything remotely responsible, you'll be grounded for a year.

Violet: Sweet! I love you! -huggles-

-end flashback-

Lemony: THAT! IS! NOT! WHAT! THEY! SAID!

Sugary: Well, why not?

Lemony: Because I wrote the book! How can it be something that I didn't write?

Sugary: Aliens?

Atrus: Your book falling into the Star Fissure?

Jack: A rabid Jack-O-Lantern ate it?

GIR: A wild moose?

Violet: A mechanical device gone horribly awry?

Sunny: Crazauthor? (The Authoress has gone insane?)

Quigley: It was stuck in the sugarbowl for safe keeping?

Olaf: What?

Klaus: A computer that wants to enslave the human race? -points to Terminator, who is standing by the cliff edge-

Terminator: Goodbye, humans. I won't be back. -Jumps off cliff. In a few moments, we hear a big explosion-

Baudelaires, Sugary, Quigley, Olaf: Ooh, esplosion...

Lemony: AAAAARRRRGGGGHHHHH! THAT'S IT! ANYONE WHO ISN'T ONE OF MY CHARICTERS CAN GET OUT NOW!

Random charicters: NO!

Lemony: Oh. Okay then.

Klaus: Uh, okay. Well, how are we going to get Olaf back to himself again?

Violet: Do we really want to?

Sugary: And then a rockslide killed everyone. The end.

Lemony: NOOOOOOO! STOP IT! -rewinds story-

Klaus: Uh, okay. Well, how are we going to get Olaf back to himself again? Woah, deja vu.

Violet: Uh... I have nothing to add here.

Klaus: You know, I read somewhere once that when people go though stress, like the blowdart gun, they forget temporarily who they are - sometimes even for the rest of their lives.

Sunny: Nolaf? (So we don't have to deal with Olaf anymore?)

Violet: Well, no, but we can't just leave him like that.

Sunny: Yuh-huh! (Sure we can!)

Violet: No Sunny, that would be irresponsible. And he IS one of Lemony's charicters, too.

Klaus: Yes! We Lemony Snicket charicters have to band together!

Sunny: Yeah! (Yeah!)

Atrus: Of course!

Violet: Hey, back off, you aren't a Lemony Snicket charicter.

Atrus: But... I don't have a charicter group to belong to anymore! -sad violin music plays-

Klaus: What happened to Cyan Worlds?

Atrus: THEY WENT OUT OF BUSINESS AFTER CREATING MYST FIVE!

Violet: Awww... I'm sorry to hear that. -sad violin music continues to play, Violet looks off screen, camera pans to show Vice Principal Nero playing his violin-

Nero: Oh... sorry. -walks off-

Sugary: What about Uru?

Atrus: Uru was made before Myst five.

Sugary: Are you sure?

Atrus: Hey, who's the Cyan charicter here? You? I don't think so!

Quigley: I'M BOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRR...

Sugary: Don't you start with me!

Jack: STOP IT! Now both of you just calm down. I'm sorry that you lost the charicter group you belong to, Atrus, and Sugary, I'm sorry you can't get Myst four to install, but that is no reason to argue!

Sugary: Fine.

Atrus: Okay.

Quigley: OOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRD! -Danny Phantom suddenly comes flying through the mountain-

Danny: Yo, yo, yo! -turns around to face mountain, shoots ectoplasmic blasts at it, engraving his insignia onto the mountain peak. Suddenly a huge spider's web covers the insignia-

Danny: HEY!

Spider-Man: -is swinging across the mountain peaks, lands on the ground- Hey, I thought I told you to stay off of my turf, Phantom!

Danny: Neither of us own it, Spidey - it's obvious Lemony does.

Spidey: Oh yeah... you're right.

Sugary: Cool! It's Spider-Man! -looks at Danny- Cool! It's Danny Phantom!

Danny: I already told you that it wasn't my fault that the Twin Towers fell!

Spidey: I spent three weeks helping people get out of there, Phantom - THREE WEEKS!

Danny: I SAID, IT WASN'T MY FAULT! -Ghostly wails at Spidey-

Spidey: Hey! Stop it! You're going to burst someone's eardrums! -shoots web at Danny, but to no avail-

Danny: Shut up!

Sugary: DANNY! SPIDEY! STOP IT! -Steps into middle of fight, only to get tangled in web and knocked to the ground. Both stop- This is childish. Cut it out and fight like men!

Danny: I suppose you're right...

Spidey: Yeah, I guess so...

Danny: I'm sorry you spent so much time cleaning up after the terrorists.

Spidey: And I'm sorry that I blamed you when you were only on a Freshman field trip to New York. It's okay.

Danny: Truce?

Spidey: Truce.

Sugary: Okay, that's all well and good, now can somebody PLEASE UNTIE ME?

Both: Oh, sorry. -Danny shoots an energy beam at the webbing, cutting it so Sugary can get out-

Sugary: Thanks.

Both: No problem. -Spidey swings off, Danny flies through the mountain again-

Lemony: SUGARY! NO MORE NON - ASOUE CHARICTERS IN THIS STORY! Please... -breaks down and cries-

Sugary: Okay, you guys, you have to leave.

Atrus, Jack, GIR, and all of the other Non-ASOUE charicters: -leave-

Sugary: There. Are you happy now?

Lemony: I doubt I'll ever be happy again, but close enough.

Violet: And we STILL have a problem. Olaf STILL doesn't know who he is, and we STILL don't know how to get down the mountain!

Quigley: -looks at random sled- I have an idea...

-five minutes later-

Klaus: Are you SURE this is such a good idea?

Quigley: Positive! Not very safe, but fun, right?

Violet: I don't care, Quigley, I love you!

-the sled, the four orphans, Olaf, Sugary, and Lemony are rushing down the frozen waterfall very quickly-

Sugary: Whee!

Lemony: Well, at least you kept ONE part of this story on track!

Quigley: Look! We're going to sled right into that tree!

Lemony: I see your- OMIGAWDWE'REGONNADIIIIIEEEEEE!

Sugary: AHHHH!

Quigley: AHHHH!

Violet: AHHHH!

Klaus: AHHHH!

Sunny: AHHHH! (AHHHH!)

-the sled slows-

-and gently-

-stops-

Sugary: -opens one eye- OMIGAWD, we're safe!

Others: YZAY!

Sugary: Well, that wasn't so bad, now - -she turns to see something and gasps-

Others: -turn and gasp-

Sugary: ...Was it?

_Mwhahahaha! Cliffhanger!_


	4. A Squee! A Squee! And Saavy goes crazy

_Hello, y'all, welcome to another awesome chapter of Forget This! The last time we were here, our heroes had paused after seeing a strange sight! I wonder what it is! Who cares! My new computer rocks and I can give it voice commands, like words and numbers and stuff! Like this: Dumpster, spam, moose!_

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Klaus: O.o

Violet: O.o

Sunny: O.o

Olaf: O.o

Quigley: O.o

Lemony: O.o

Sugary: O.o

Violet: ……. What is it?

Sugary: It's….. it's…… I don't know what it is.

-We pan left from Sugary to see a huge army of Squees- (A/N: For anyone who doesn't know what a Squee is, it looks sort of like a mix between a squirrel, a chinchilla, and a rat. And it's really cute.)

Lemony: AAAAARRRGGGHHHH! God, Sugary, not ANOTHER Myst III Exile allusion!

Sugary: But I like Myst III Exile! It's my favorite computer game! And it's MY story!

Lemony: IT IS NOT YOUR STORY, SUGARY! -Deeeeeeep breath- It's MINE!

Squee: -looks at Lemony for a second, then jumps on his head-

Lemony: ARRRRGGGHHH! Get this thing off of me!

Olaf: I wish I could…uh… O.o Who are you again?

Quigley: I'm sexy!

Violet: Oh, yes you sure as hell are!

Sugary: Violet! No swearing in this story! We have to keep it below a T rating, you know!

-All of the sudden, a rather human-looking shape appears out of the mass of Squees-

Sunny: Gasquee! (Look at that strange figure emerging from the Squees!)

Sugary: By golly, you're right, Sunny! There is someone coming from out of the Squees! -strains eyes to see who it is, then suddenly gasps in horror and falls back, tripping over several Squees as she does so-

Squees: -squeal and squeak in order to alert that they are trapped beneath the authoress-

Sugary: Sits up oh, I'm sorry, little Squees! I hope that you're okay!

Squee: looks at Sugary Squeak chittery squeaker squeaken! (&$# You!) hops off

Sugary: My, what a rude Squee!

Lemony: -Is beginning to lose his patience-

Violet: What's wrong, Sugary?

Klaus: What happened?

Sugary: T-th-th…. That…..

Others: -turn to look and end up staring at the humanoid figure emerging from the Squees, now much closer to the group-

Quigley: Who is it?

Olaf: WHAT is it?

Sugary: It's…

Lemony: What?

Sugary: It's…

Lemony: WHAT?

Sugary: OMIGAWDIT'SSAAVEDROHE'SCOMETOKILLUSWITHHISHAMMEROFDOOM!

All ASOUE characters: Who's Saavedro?

Sugary: A whacked-out nut job from the third Myst game. He happens to have a hammer with him. And he's NOT shy about using it, either. I've tangled with him once or twice, and trust me, when he gets mad, he gets REALLY mad. And he makes all of the Myst fans call him Saavy.

Lemony: SUGARY! Why did you stick him in the story!

Saavy: I wasn't stuck here. I linked here. See? -Taps cover of linking book that reads "Cleverly Placed Plot Device" with his hammer-

Lemony: GAAAAAHHHHH! WHY!

Saavy: Um, are you crazy? Because I have the number of a very good therapist. She helped me, and I'm sure she can help you.

Sugary: -very nervous- Uh, he's fine. He's just, you know, upset that I'm screwing up his story. Ya know?

Saavy: O.o Uh, yeah, what was the…. The part about the…. What now? -A Squee hops into his line of vision. Saavy immediately goes berserk.- OMIGAWDASQUEEGETAWAYFROMMESQUEEYEAHYOUBETTERRUNFORYOURPATHEICLIFEHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Lemony: No. No! NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!

Saavy: Hey, that's my line! -Smacks Lemony in the head with his hammer-

Lemony: -Falls unconscious-

Sugary: AAHH!

Quigley: What the?

Saavy: SHUT UP! -Smacks Quigley in head with hammer-

Quigley: -Falls unconscious-

Sugary: NO!

Saavy: Anyone ELSE want to say something?

Violet: Oh.

Klaus: My.

Sunny: Gawd.

Saavy: -boomerangs the hammer so it hits all three of them in rapid succession- Boo-yeah! -Looks angrily at Sugary- Dang it! Now you've undone all of my therapy!

Sugary: I'm sorry! I didn't know! -Moves Olaf in front of her- Hit Olaf first! He's tall and can't remember anything!

Saavy: -Looks annoyed for a moment, then lightly taps Olaf with his hammer-

Olaf: -falls unconscious-

Sugary: No, Saavedro, no, no, no! Spare me! I don't taste good! No, please……

Saavy: -Is about to hit Sugary, but something makes him stop-

Random Narrator: Nobody really knows why Saavedro chose not to kill Sugary. Was it the fact that she looked so trapped and defeated, as he had so long ago? Or was it that he just didn't feel like it for once?

Sugary: Who was that?

Saavy: I have no idea.

Lemony: -wakes up and boots Saavedro out of the story- What was that stupid crap for?

Sugary: I had to have at least ONE good moment of suspense in this story!

Olaf: -wakes up- God, my head hurts. Hey, what are the orphans doing on the ground?

Violet: -wakes up- Ow. -Looks at Olaf- Hey, cutie!

Olaf: Uh, Violet?

Violet: -giggles- Yes?

Olaf: Why are you looking at me like that?

Violet: -giggles again, then proceeds towards him-

Olaf: Violet? Stop! Cut it out! I don't like you when you actually want me! Waahhh! -runs off-

Lemony: VIOLET!

Violet: -stops as if in a trance-

Lemony: You don't like Olaf. Olaf likes you. And you find it disgusting.

Violet: -trance-like- Yes, sir. -suddenly snaps out of it- Ew. Was I just thinking what I think I was thinking? I think? -turns to see Quigley- QUIGGLES!

Quigley: -wakes up- Violet! -The two hug-

Olaf: Well, ya win some, ya lose some….. -disappears-

Sugary: I guess that's the end.

Lemony: I guess so. I suppose that you didn't do TOO bad of a job.

Violet: But what about my siblings?

Quigley: -Looks at them- leave em' there.

Violet: But Quigley, I - -Quigley kisses Violet, and she forgets about her siblings for the moment-

Quigley: What siblings, sweetie?

Violet: -Madly in love- What siblings?

Lemony: Uh….

Sugary: Bye, Lemony!

Lemony: Wait! -Spider-Man and Danny are fighting in mid-air, Saavy is chasing a Squee, Atrus is chasing Saavy, Harry Potter is flying about on his broomstick, Jack Skellington is trying to scare poor little GIR, and a moose is running rampant through everyone, bellowing madly. There are streamers, food, and blood on the ground-

Baudelaires and Quigley: -Collectively leave-

Lemony: But wait! Who's going to help me pick up this mess?

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_Well, that's it. I hope you enjoyed this little pet project of mine. I will get back to the more coherent stories next time I submit a document. The next story I'm doing will be entitled "The Incredible Island," and it once again delves into the Myst universe – except that it's the Baudelaires who must find a way home! Stay tuned, y'all, and I'll be seeing ya on the other side._


End file.
